在開始今天的信息以先，我想請你思想一個問題：為甚麼雖然我們對神有頗成熟的信仰，但是在沒有得到神清晰的指示或控制的時候，我們仍然會感到沮喪？這問題的答案是：因為我們過份倚靠自己，而沒有完全的倚靠神。

當我檢視自己的生命時，不斷會感到驚訝，因為在經過了超過五十年的基督教信仰，我有時仍然會獨立自主而不是倚靠神的取向。你不是也有類似的問題嗎？我非常渴望行走神的道路，但是又想使用自己的方法。不錯，雖然現在與三十年前相比，這個情況已經沒有那麼嚴重，但有時仍然需要一番掙扎。

今天的信息對我有些甚麼啟示呢？它表示在我生命的領域裡，我仍然需要擯棄自我中心的老我，而在寫下這些話以前，我跪下來向主承認這點。我將來可能仍然會與這個問題搏鬥，但在這一刻我非常能夠肯定我比以前任何時候都更願意順服神。也許這是我在這件事上要打的最後一場仗，當我發現自己在面對未來那些模糊不清的景況、而不再害怕結果時，我便知道這個問題已經徹底解決了。今天我順服了聖靈的催促向你坦誠分享了我內心的想法，因為我和你一樣都是那麼的需要神。

Today we ask ourselves: Why is it that even though we may have a fairly mature faith in God, we still find it frustrating to be caught up in situations where we have no clear direction or control? The root cause of this is misplaced dependency - we depend too much upon ourselves and not enough upon God.

As I examine my own life, I am constantly amazed that after over fifty years' experience in the Christian faith, I am still sometimes prone to take the way of independence rather than dependence. Do you not find a similar tendency in yourself? I want God's way - so very much - but I want it on my own terms. Granted, this is less of a problem now than it was, say, thirty years ago, but it is still sometimes a struggle nevertheless.

What does this say about me? It says that in this area of my life, there is still a need to die to my own self-concern, and even before these lines were written I had to get down on my knees and acknowledge this before the Lord. I may still have struggles with this issue in the future, but I know for sure that at this moment, my will is more yielded to Him than ever. Perhaps this is the last battle I shall have to fight on this matter, and when I find myself facing situations in the future that are vague and ambiguous without fearing the outcome, I will know the issue has been settled once and for all. I have exposed my heart to you in obedience to the prompting of the Spirit. I need Him as much as you.